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In the Colette novel that is my daily existence, I try to take some time away from the glamour to focus on people like, well, you. Because if I can bring a little hope into your humdrum lives, it makes me feel all my hard work ain’t been in vain for nuthin’.

And no… there has been no noticable improvement on the water-main leak situation, and no word of help coming soon. So, we simply must assume that, like the noble yet cuddly polar bear, we are soon to be destroyed by the rising tide. (Also: we are quite vicious.) But there the similarities end. For instead of a rising tide of pristine arctic ice, our doom is kind of… scummy… and green. But comparing extinctions is a losing sport.

Lets get back to glamour, shall we?

There may be – wait for it! – exciting purchases in the very near future. For one: lovely chairs. A possibility, at the least. But, I can report that it is most certain that there will soon be new towels in the Haus. I know! I can feel the swoon beginning at the mere thought… towels, you say! It cannot be done! Surely you jest! Allow me to adjust my monocle at the very idea! Well, I promised you glamour. And I do NOT disappoint.

It is the presence of houseguests that makes the purchase of new towels necessary. Clearly, El Spousador and I will dry ourselves with rags we found at the dump… but as soon as someone comes to visit, I can hear my mother’s voice in my brain telling me to “make a damned effort and have some pride”. So only the freshest and fluffiest of towels will do when company is coming. It’s what I like to call the “Set Design Home-Making” style. If only we could rent a dog, and some adorably well-behaved children!

Clambake tomorrow. Naturally, rain is predicted. Thank you, Mother Nature. I plant rain gardens for you, I sell my car for you, I gave up diet soda and most processed foods (mostly) for you… and you rain on my party. You’re a total wench. Just ’cause you’re bigger don’t make you right!

Rumor has it I may be set loose – unleashed! as it were – as early as 1 pm today. Hide. Yo. Husbands.